Scientific experiments of a lazy man

I made a discovery today. When the brain really wants to, it is amazing at what speed it can process information. The list in this post details information processing over the course of approximately 0.2 seconds.

All the things you can find time to think about going down the stairs to the basement carrying the laundry basket:

• Why do I suddenly have this floating sensation?
• That wall sure is approaching fast, wonder if I have time to turn around so I don't hit it face first.
• When I turned around, was it really such a good idea to push the laundry basket away AFTER I was facing upwards?
• Why is that bottle of detergent heading for my groin area going 276 km/h?
• BRACE FOR IMPACT!
• Damn, that rib head just healed properly too...
• YAAAAOOOOOOOOOWW! Ah, that's right. Hard objects hitting at the exact right position and going fast enough really does make you see stars. I'll just stay here in the fetal position for a few seconds.......

Needless to say, the trip after this went a bit slower than usual. On the bright side, at least now I'm not just a sissy who break my ribs coughing. I'm finally a man! It now takes a flight of brick stairs, a brick wall and a laundry hamper to knock me down. And a bottle of detergent to the groin to ensure I walk like the hunchback of Notre Dame for 10 minutes after getting back up.